What's the point?

Wow, been reading for 3 months and always thought Tart was a man!

If you walked up to a bloke in a pub in the UK and mistakenly referred to him as a tart you might just get a good sock in the kisser! 😀

Islandlovin that is your perception. You don't know what "oldbies" are thinking when they give you advice. It is a generational thing. The last two generations tries to save each new generation from the mistakes they made. They are not trying to be mean, only trying to help and make things easier for you. What they are saying is absolutely correct but you don't want to hear it. How they deliver it is on a moving forum doesn't always sound like good advice. If you were in front of them it might sound a little more gently to your ears. Very few "transplants are able to come here and start a business and succeed. What the "oldbies" don't know is each person and their determination to succeed.

We just all need to be a little nicer to each other. Everyone who posts here are adults. Take the information, consider it, good or bad, whether you want to hear it or not and then make a decision. Don't kill the messenger. They are just giving you information. The people giving advice, (the messengers need to give advice with a little more respect) should give the information and move on. We are not everybodys mommy.

I fail to understand how replying to someones opinion with "oh that's right, you don't live here do you" falls into the good advice or any advice category. That comment was what sparked this whole thing and then the poster of that comment sat back to watch the guano fly. Unfortunately not the first time I've seen that kind of mean spirited behavior on here and I am still brand new. Frankly it's disgusting!

Islandlovin that is your perception. You don't know what "oldbies" are thinking when they give you advice. It is a generational thing. The last two generations tries to save each new generation from the mistakes they made. They are not trying to be mean, only trying to help and make things easier for you. What they are saying is absolutely correct but you don't want to hear it. How they deliver it is on a moving forum doesn't always sound like good advice. If you were in front of them it might sound a little more gently to your ears. Very few "transplants are able to come here and start a business and succeed. What the "oldbies" don't know is each person and their determination to succeed.

We just all need to be a little nicer to each other. Everyone who posts here are adults. Take the information, consider it, good or bad, whether you want to hear it or not and then make a decision. Don't kill the messenger. They are just giving you information. The people giving advice, (the messengers need to give advice with a little more respect) should give the information and move on. We are not everybodys mommy.

I fail to understand how replying to someones opinion with "oh that's right, you don't live here do you" falls into the good advice or any advice category. That comment was what sparked this whole thing and then the poster of that comment sat back to watch the guano fly. Unfortunately not the first time I've seen that kind of mean spirited behavior on here and I am still brand new. Frankly it's disgusting!

I've experienced that on here too. And I'm so new I don't even live there full time yet. It discourages earnest questions and replies. A few are ego tripping. But I think most of it is just writing tone. We can't see the body language or hear the tone of voice. So we don't get the whole picture. Written words are powerful and people interpret them differently. I believe if some of the messengers could concentrate on a more respectful way of imparting knowledge, without belittling, and the respondees worked on thickening their skin a little bit, the forum would better for it.

No one seems to know how to take constructive criticism anymore.

I originally came to STX as a part of HOVIC- that will tell youhow long I've lived on STX. As a former career Merchant Marine, I had already travelled somewhat extensively, and often called some out of the way places "home". A veteran traveller.

Greet everything, even the negative things with a smile, the basic addage "treat others like the way you want to be treated" applies fully.
Communicate (not one way- two way communication) freely and genuinely, compromise is an art to be mastered anywhere, especially in the Caribbean.

Though I am somewhat rueful of the VIG and what I equate to be ineffectual heavy handed treatment, I must admit that many of my dealings have been pleasant and sucessful, especially when working within a system that needs repair. It's often not the fault of the office worker or representative- it just that, that is the way things are- don't try and change it in one fail swoop- work within the system to make it better.

Some of the businesses, especially local ones, have been a real pleasure to do business with- and with few exceptions; I have been happy.

There is NO SUBSTITUTE for a heartly ice breaker- Good Morning, Good Day, Good Eevening, Good Night. Your opening adressing will, believe it or not, directly address your rate of success- I am from NYC originally, and when I return there, I use these opening salutations- usually to the chagrin and amazement of my former peers- but albeit most reply in kind.

Yes, I love the VI, especially my beloved STX, and wouldn;t ever want to return to the mainland for all of the "tea in china" unless there were circumstances beyond our control-

We had an old addage amongst my seafaring peers- "when you're in another man's ballpark, you best play ball by THEIR rules".....

What surprises me is that anyone would actually say it will take 25 years to get to know a place. When I moved to STX in 95, I lost everything I brought to the island due to Marilyn. I went 3 months without electricity. I certainly do not think it takes 25 years to get to know a place. And, are you saying that that makes you know all, be all? After you've actually been in the islands that long maybe, just maybe things have changed. I have asked and haven't gotten a good answer about things on here and have met people who have recently moved to the islands and their experience was completely different than the oldies post on here.
Prehaps 25 years ago when you moved here you couldn't ship things in your vehicle and oldbies keep repeating that, but, I now I have heard from recent transplants where they WERE allowed to ship their things in their cars, and or trucks. That is just an example. Just because you have been here 25 years doesn't make you know everything and when have you moved lately. This forum, I thought, was called VIMoving Center.....M. O. V. I. N. G. center, yes? And, some of your answers are very out dated. Not to mention the curtness when you tell people to read the antiquated posts where things have changed. Just my opinion.

@blu4u i just had this same type conversation, on the phone, with Judy of St Croix car rental lady. I asked why so much negativity on the message boards about moving there. Her response was that she's been there 8 years and loves it. The cost of living is more but felt it was well worth it. I could feel the enjoyment in her tone. That being said, it's hard to tell the tone through message boards so maybe I'm miss understanding what I read. Maybe some of the elders of the island wouldn't mind PM ing their phone number to certain posters and have a meaningful conversation and this might lighten the tone being taken through the board. I've talked to a couple of residents and that has helped with my perception of St. Croix and I'm now scheduled for PMV visit 8-4.

I don't think you were misunderstanding, I got that same vibe. I was just in STX on a PMV for almost 3 weeks and have to agree that this board REALLY can scare people away intentionally or not.... and it's sad. I was TERRIFIED about the crime after reading that rogue camping thread. I mean we've been sacking money away for 6 months and had flights booked to STX, but threads here made me almost cancel my PMV!!!!! I am SO glad I did not, just arrived home a bit ago (AZ) and have been reflecting on the trip. Honestly I didn't experience AANNYY of the issues people from this forum warned about. Blame it on my short time, ok fair enough. What I will say is that I found everything we needed in stores, i didn't "want" for anything, grocerie prices weren't a deal breaker, people were AMAZINGLY kind (I of course used the greetings) I even got a job offer that I wasn't even looking for!!! I love the chickens running around, the iguanas, tossing my hair in a ponytail without makeup and generally not worrying about much. We even got towed in Christiansted, the cab driver (gold van) took us to Pelles and waited with us for 2 hours until we could get our car, AND it was his birthday!! We told stories, laughed, grabbed a beer at the gas station and hung out. That says a lot that we had a good time even after getting towed lol! What a guy!!

You have to go with a COMPLETELY OPEN MIND and be willing to bend like a tree in the breeze.

The 25 year comment is hilarious to me! I'm only 32 so you see how that would work. I've financially positioned myself to be able to move to STX regardless if temporary or permanent. We may live there for a year or maybe 50, WHO KNOWS!?!? Life and what you want from it, is always changing.

I'm gonna have to (as a newbie-to be) totally agree with Blu and the list they had posted. It's great insight for possible VI-ers. Thank! 🙂

Prehaps 25 years ago when you moved here you couldn't ship things in your vehicle and oldbies keep repeating that, but, I now I have heard from recent transplants where they WERE allowed to ship their things in their cars, and or trucks.

I think you'll find that this very much depends on where you're shipping from and with whom. I do believe that several years ago it was OK across the board to fill your car with your personal possessions but for various reasons (theft, heightened security, etc.) this changed over the years. I don't recall from this forum that longtime residents "keep repeating" misinformation on that score.

Thank you, I LOVE this thread!!!

I just logged on to look for something specific my husband was asking me about, and was glad to see this! This board was a valuable resource for us when we first came to St. Croix 6 years ago, but I have since stopped following it or recommending it to others because I was so disappointed with how negative, catty, and downright nasty many of the posts had become.

Island living is certainly not for everyone. But for our family (and our special "island family")...wherever we are...Positive really IS how we live! 🙂

Have a great week, everyone!

I never spoke very much about crime when posting. We were slightly affected, but it never was an issue for us. We've been gone for 6 months, left just after the Hovensa announcement, so I don't know if things are different.

What I was (and am) ALWAYS negative about is people moving to the USVI with school age chidren and a middle class budget. This combination calls for great caution and lots of research. A pre-move visit, with the kids is really needed.

Cal me super careful, but I would rather discourage a family from making the move than see them struggle and flnally leave island in a personal and financial mess.

I don't endorse Senator Nelson but I do live by his slogan:

Positive is How I Live

All hthe negative posters on here are those people who find things to complain about no matter where they live. Paradise is a state of mind.
However, beautiful ocean water, lush green hills, and a laid back lifestyle help to enhance that state of mind 🙂

Cheers to all you haters on here, hope ya'll have agood day.

Yes I, One Love.

I'm glad I stopped back by and saw this post. I'm about to go on my trip to the USVI and thought I might need to log back in to the forum to update myself a little bit. I sensed some negativity here but tried to remember that everyone is made a little differently and expresses themselves as best they can. Sometimes I thought several people who responded to my question were trying to discourage me, but really, they're just speaking from what they know and their gut feeling. I got Several AWESOME and encouraging private messages to my question. I'm not sure why they felt the need to tell me privately. Perhaps they figured it was the best way to tell me without getting into some disagreement/backlash online?! I don't ask questions unless I'm fully prepared for whatever response I may receive. I have to be open to whatever comes back to me so I can process the info without my own bias of the expected response. In the end, as much opinion as people can give you, you still have to go see for yourself. I appreciate ALL of the feedback. The more information I have, the more comfortable I am with making a decision. But I also appreciate this post because it helps people who just arrive to the site see that what may be perceived as negative shouldn't instantly chase you off. (or if it does, you really aren't ready for adventure/change and challenges)

The struggles and difficulties make life's rewards that much sweeter.

HA!! I say this as I am getting ready to do what Kerry and I call our quarterly "marathon grocery shopping day" (refering to the struggles of getting Kerry motivated to do it and the difficulties of finding everything we need at a decent price without having to take ALL day and FIVE stores.) :$) But the reward of not having to do any grocery shopping (aside from fresh veggies or milk) for another three to four months is a sweet one! And if we do it right, I just might be able to get in an hour of soaking at Secret Harbour before the noseeums come out, which would make this day off much better. 😎 As long as the rain ceases by then.

I appreciate ALL of the feedback.

This, and nothing more. Message board folks and no reason to get your bangers and your etouffee confused. If you mix them together you may find a pleasant meal that can be had by all. Ultimately that is the point of a message board, to best gauge the mixed opinions of others. No need to force your opinion, after all, you may be talking to your new neighbor...

To quote the singer Eric Stone....."Paradiase is not a place, it's a state of mind"

I was active on this board a few months back and left because of all the negativity. When it was affecting my everyday life, my fiance said, "time for you to leave." I came back tonight just to check in and found this thread.

The fiance has now lived here (STX) almost 10 years. I have been here a year. We both LOVE STX and will not live anywhere else, unless life forces us to. We have friends, a good life, and a laid back way of existence that truly is wonderful. The lists that others have made above, I pretty much agree with - it is all what you choose to make of it.

And to add to the discussion about food - I buy a tremendous amount of fresh produce every week, local chickens and eggs, and fresh fish and as many other local food items as I can find. We have amazing meals, way healthier then our stateside eating habits - primarily because we don't eat many packaged foods. And the local grocery stores actually have a lot of organic and healthy foods, for the items that you need to buy that are shipped here. A key is also to embrace local produce! Breadfruit and carambola and lots of other variety is good for you. 🙂

So for those considering relocating here, I'm glad to see this thread started. It is like anywhere else - good, bad, challenges, and rewards. There are lots of opinions and lots of lifestyles. It's finding what works for you that is important.

"Paradiase is not a place, it's a state of mind"

Well said!

(tu)(tu)

Yay, Julie! Julie you were one of the main reasons I didn't give up on these boards. You are so awesome. These message boards need you. Don't go away. You were super helpful and positive!

Just bummed your car broke down that one day when we were going to meet on my 36 hour visit. I hope you are well. Keep smiling.

I was active on this board a few months back and left because of all the negativity. When it was affecting my everyday life, my fiance said, "time for you to leave." I came back tonight just to check in and found this thread.

The fiance has now lived here (STX) almost 10 years. I have been here a year. We both LOVE STX and will not live anywhere else, unless life forces us to. We have friends, a good life, and a laid back way of existence that truly is wonderful. The lists that others have made above, I pretty much agree with - it is all what you choose to make of it.

And to add to the discussion about food - I buy a tremendous amount of fresh produce every week, local chickens and eggs, and fresh fish and as many other local food items as I can find. We have amazing meals, way healthier then our stateside eating habits - primarily because we don't eat many packaged foods. And the local grocery stores actually have a lot of organic and healthy foods, for the items that you need to buy that are shipped here. A key is also to embrace local produce! Breadfruit and carambola and lots of other variety is good for you. 🙂

So for those considering relocating here, I'm glad to see this thread started. It is like anywhere else - good, bad, challenges, and rewards. There are lots of opinions and lots of lifestyles. It's finding what works for you that is important.

Yay, Julie! Julie you were one of the main reasons I didn't give up on these boards. You are so awesome. These message boards need you. Don't go away. You were super helpful and positive!

Just bummed your car broke down that one day when we were going to meet on my 36 hour visit. I hope you are well. Keep smiling.

Aw, thank you!!! And yes, when you're on STT and get the itch to take the Seaplane over to sloth around with us Cruzans, drinks are on me! I'm glad things are going exactly right for you! 🙂