Thanks

I personally would not leave my 2 year-old son to move to the VI. Please remember that any unhappiness and problems will come with you. And you will be without your support system.

If you cannot afford a PMV, please think very seriously about making the move. Living here is expensive as is traveling back to the states. Having at least $10,000 as a cushion is not excessive. Even if you find a place to live for under $1,000, most landlords require first, last and one months security deposit. Add a car and utility deposits and costs can add up very quickly. Plus, with a small child in the states, you will want an emergeny fund in case you have to get back quickly.

My 2 cents. Good luck whatever you decide.

None of my business, but please don't leave your son for the VI. Children need both parents. Sorry, my 2 cents.

There is a couple of Foot Lockers on STT, although getting a wait staff job or bar tending job might be more profitable. I think a PMV will be good for you, however don't burn your bridges back home before moving. You may want to change your perspective on a succeed or fail scenario. We lived on island for two years and moved back stateside. I don't think we 'failed' at anything. That would be depressing. We chose to move to island and chose to move stateside, both successfully. Anyway, my husband would add that he moved to island three months ahead of myself and the kids, that is probably his biggest regret. He missed his family and can't get that time back. You will miss your family as well. I hope it all works out for you, but not moving to island in the first place isn't failure either.

Teresa

IMHO - it would be unutterably selfish of you to geographically remove yourself from such a young child. I am sorry, but this is not specific to 'moving to the VI'. Your young son needs to have you in his life on a regular, dependable, accessible basis - not a whizzy vacation every now and again basis.
Working in retail, I doubt that you would have the resources to fly 'home' every weekend!!!!!!!!
No matter, how dead end etc . you feel your life is.......you have a responsibility to that child that is inescapable until he is a grown man. Find another way to make yourself happy, but not at the expense of yet another child with no father.
Stay and do your duty, young man. The VI will be there later.

Just something to think about. Its going to be hard for you to support yourself at first, are you going to have enough to cover child support during the lean times?

What's the difference between if he lives in NYC & his ex decides to move to L.A? Nobody knows what his situation is with his child. I don't think it's a great idea to move away from a child but it's not always the opposite parent's choice.

In almost every instance of any kind of shared custody at all, the custodial parent must seek the permission of the court ( within the jurisdiction that they currently abide) to relocate a significant distance. The non-custodial parent has various and sundry rights that can, and often are, protected in law.
So, it is different.

Not with a few people I know. Again, I'd personally stick around until the child is older but it's really none of my business.

Usually when you move from your child at a great distance people do it to take advantage of a great job opportunity. Most parents do not want to be far from their children and would only do so for a very good reason. To follow a dream to live in "paradise" seems more then a little selfish. You made the child the child has to eat everyday it is your duty to make sure that child has a good life or at the very least is supported. The kid is 25 years old stress out and probably over burdened and the vi makes a nice dream for him, I just think he should put his child first in his planning thoughts(which I hope by researching this board he is doning and am not trying to put you down). At least save up 10k before you come so you can pay your support, find steady work, find a apt (pay for first,last, & deposit), get transportation, get all your utilities turned on etc.

I think everyone needs to calm down a bit on the son thing... We have no idea what the situation is with his son. For all we know the son could be 25. I'm not saying i think it's right to leave a young child to chase a dream, but let's not be so quick to pass judgement.
Regardless good luck with whatever you do.

Swack, his previous message said that he is 27, so I doubt his son is 25.

TJ wrote: "PS.....something is wrong with my username, it won't let me log in...hmm?"

It should be working now. Try to log in. If you have any trouble, note the error message and email it to me so I can look into it.

--Islander