FROM MR USMAN KAMAL..
BILL AND EXCHANGE MANAGER
BANK OF AFRICA(BOA)
OUAGADOUGOU BURKINA FASO. CONFIDENCIAL
DEAR FRIEND,
I AM THE MANAGER OF BILL AND EXCHANGE AT THE FOREIGN REMITTANCE DEPARTMENT OF BANK OF AFRICA(B.O.A) HERE IN OUAGADOUGOU,BURKINA FASO. IN MY DEPARTMENT WE DISCOVERD AN ABANDONED SUM OF$25 MILLION UNITED STATE DOLLARS(TWENTY FIVE MILLION US DOLLARS IN AN ACCOUNT THAT BELONGE TO ONE OF OUR FORIEGN CUSTOMER(MR. ANDREAS SCHRANNER FROM MUNICH, GERMANY) WHO DIED ALONG WITH HIS ENTIRE FAMILY IN JULY 2000 IN A PLANE
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/europe/859479.stm
SINCE WE GOT THE INFORMATION ABOUT HIS DEATH, WE HAVE BEEN EXPECTING HIS NEXT OF KIN TO COME OVER AND CLAIM HIS MONEY BECAUSE WE CANNOT RELEASE IT,UNLESS SOMEBODY APPPLIES FOR THE NEXT OF KIN OR RELATION TO THE DECEASED AS INDICATED IN OUR BANKING GUIDLING AND LAW BUT UNFORTUNATELY WE LEARNT THAT HIS NEXT OF KIN DIED ALONG WITH HIM IN THE PLANE CRASH.
THE BANKER GUIDLINE HERE A RESPONSABLE PERSON, AND WHO THE BANK CAN INTROSSTED THIS TREASURY AS UNCLAIMED FUND.THE RESQUEST OF FORIEGNER AS NEXT OF KIN IN HIS BUSINESS IS OCCASSIONED BY THE FACT THAT THE CUSTOMER WAS A FOREIGNER AND A BURKINABLE CANNOT STAND AS NEXT OF KIN TO A FOREIGNER.
I AGREE THAT 30% OF THIS MONEY WILL BE FOR YOU AS A RESPECT TO THE PROVISION OF A FOREIGN ACCOUNT,10% WILL BE SET ASIDE FOR ANY EXPENSES INCURRED DURING THE BUSINESS AND 60% WOULD BE FOR ME, THEREAFTER, I WILL VISIT YOUR COUNTRY FOR DISBURSEMENT ACCORDING
TO THE PERCENTAGE INDICATED THEREFORE, TO ENABLE THE IMMEDIATE TRANSFER OF THIS FUND TO YOU AS ARRANGED, YOU MUST APPLY FIRST TO THE BANK AS RELATION OR NEXT OF KIN OF THE DECEASED INDICATING YOUR BANK NAME, YOUR BANK ACCOUNT NUMBER, YOUR PRIVATE TELEPHONE NUMBER AND YOUR FAX NUMBER FOR EASY AND EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATION AND LOCATION WHERE IN THE MONEY WILL BE REMITTED.
UPON RECEPIT OF YOUR REPLY, I WILL SEND TO YOU BY FAX OR EMAIL THE TEXT OF APPLICATION.I WILL NOT FAIL TO BRING TO YOUR NOTICE THIS TRANSACTION IS HITCH-FREE AND THAT YOU SHOULD NOT ENTERTAIN ANY ATOM OF FEAR AS ALL REQUIRD ARRANGEMENTS HAVE BEEN MADE FOR THE TRANSFER. YOU SHOULD CONTACT ME IMMEDIATELY AS SOON AS YOU RECEIVE THIS LETTER.
TRUSTING TO HEAR FROM YOU IMMEDIATELY.
YOUR's FAITHFULLY,
FROM MR USMAN KAMAL.
lol, just got that email through my yahoo account
Read page 10 in todays print version of the VI DAILY NEWS
The story about Haitian mud cookies???
yeah Trade, i guess there is still a small part of me that is not cynical and jaded, that story just hurt to read.
It sure did.
i've got 5 deer on the other side of my fence right now eating grass with the goats, so cool.
ok here's the renter saga and why i will no longer rent rooms in my house to stateside island strays, i'll rent to the short time guys that come here to work at hess. june 2001 we placed an ad in the avis advertising rooms to rent in a 4bdrm house, alot of calls later we decided on a couple from the city, they came out and looked around liked the space and moved in presto we had 2 in one room then another call and we had another in one room, the way my house is set up you have 3 bdrms and a bath on one side of the house K,LV,DR and Laundry in the center and then the owners suite on the other side with huge bdrm bath and livingroom. well the first month went by and it was ok, the single guy had no car and hitched everywhere even though he was told he need a car, he then started smoking crack in his room, and the couple started to drink very heavy every day, she was turkish and irish and about 4foot tall and he was a very big,built black guy that primped all day and did tai-chi in the yard when he was drunk, the crack guy was just an average white guy here from California, whining and crying all the time about his dead wife, now these 3 were picture perfect people that seemed suitable for renting to, but after a month here they fell apart, from our standpoint it was interesting to watch and somewhat entertaining, the couple would get into these arguments and yell at each other and the other guy just hid in his room and smoked crack, well the couple broke up and she went back to the city while her boyfriend stayed and tried to work but when you primp and drink all day and don't have a car well good luck, well the crack guy who was living on ramen and rum in his room snuck into the primpers room one day and got caught by him trying to steal money well all hell broke loose between those two and the primper ended up chasing the crack guy through the house out into the yard beating on him and the crack guy was crying and carrying on yelling for help so the other half and i mixed up a cocktail and sat outside and watched it all unfold, it was quite entertaining because the primper was naked for some reason running and beating on this poor guy who ended up climbing over our fence to get away from him so i called a cab and threw all his stuff over the fence and told him to go away, well he went to f'sted and ended up cooking pizza at the dog and living in the craphole above the bar. The primper had no money and decided that since we are 2 gay men that we'd be interested in letting him live here for free in return for "favors", LOL well that just was'nt going to happen so i tracked down his girlfried in the city and she flew him home. so that was the first 3 renters we had back in 2001
the next guy came along in 2002, he was a dj here at one of the local stations,seemed like a nice guy knew everyone, seemed normal ok he moves in and then proceeds to take all of our 2000cd's to the station he worked at to burn copies of without asking, the stations music did seem to improve after that though, he then got demoted to ad sales and voice overs and started to drink really heavy and pass out on the floor in the living room, he also had a girlfriend that would spend the night about 4 nights a week that the other half and i called the screamer,yes she was quite passionnate and hard to look in the eye the next day getting coffee from the kitchen, well one night he was totally blasted and the gf was not here and he figured in his drunkenness that he'd like to try being gay, we told him it does'nt quite work that way and he was gone by the end of the week, i think he was here for 3 months, he's back in states and married last i heard, ok that was renter number 4, the next 2 both came along in about july of 2002, one for each room, they knew each other from town so i figured all was well.lol nope the one started smoking crack all day long and the other was just loud,cocky and looking for a fight all the time,red head boston irish with an attitude, the other half and the irish absolutly hated each other and the irish did'nt like his friend anymore in the other room and i just did'nt care one way or another lol i needed that 800 bucks a month, well to keep the other half happy they both got booted after about 3 months. they were renters 4,5,and 6
trw - I've figured out your problem with tenants... you aren't charging them enough! If you charge them more rent, they won't have money to start smoking crack and they may stay the same people you interview to begin with. It's worth a shot! Tell them you are saving them from a life of addiction.
lol Alexandra, you may be right, i still have 7 more renters to write about
Couldn't open the firewood shed today because the hinges were frozen shut. Scraped enough ice off the driveway to get the Jeep out in 4-wheel-drive. Three layers of clothing weren't nearly enough. The cold crisp of winter air stayed wrapped around me until I shuffled back into the house and stood by the fire.
Once the Jeep had heated up enough to rattle out onto the white street, I put yet another coat over the three layers and shuddered off to the the store for some milk. The covered bridge was a theme-park ride.
Can't wait to get back to stx.
Gee, trw, I never realized how dull my life is compared to yours. :$) What does crack smell like, anyway? I'll be the first to buy your book if you ever decide to write one.
Jimkelly, got any Cruzan rum up there to thaw yourself out?
i've got the chicken story yet to talk about as well, they eat centipedes lol
They haven't even heard of 151 rum up here in Vermont. You wouldn't think folks who live out their existence in minus zero degree weather would have such an affection for beer.
Thanks for asking... now I have to find a lesser rum somewhere.
Trouble is, you can't bring any to VT since you can't fly with 151. Guess you'll just have to drink twice as much regular. 🙂
I've bought Bacardi 151 rum in VT before--not Cruzan, but it'll do!
Here's a list of the rum you can buy in VT and which ones have to be special ordered:
www.state.vt.us/dlc/retail/priceguide/rum.html
I hope you find something to warm your innards!
trw--your stories just crack me up. I can't wait for the next installment. It's like reading a good serial in a weekly magazine. I don't have anything nearly that entertaining, but it reminded me of a condo neighbor I had in DC. She lived across the hall from me and had a cat. She was always screaming at the cat (the walls weren't that thick), which I thought was kind of peculiar. She also had a "Jesus loves me" sticker on her car. One day when my boyfriend was over (now my husband), I noticed that same foul smell coming from her apartment. It smelled like dust burning off the furnace (or in this case, heat pump), like it does when you turn the furnace on for the first time in the winter. I commented to my husband that you'd think the dust would have burned off her heat pump by now, to which he replied in a rather exasperated tone, "that's not dust burning off, that's pot." Oh well, I still don't understand why she wasn't more mellow... KJ
Thanks, LG... this may hold me over until I can move back to the land of sunshine and hermit crabs.
thanks klj555 they are all true and in no way embellished, hey jimkelly we used to have everclear up in minnesota and north dakota which is pure grain alcohol much like 151, and trade,crack actually smells kinda ok not stinky by any means, pot really does stink, the guy i stayed with for 2 months over on STT smoked pot everyminute of the day i had to febreeze everything before i wore it, he was the boston irish guy from my previous story and i thought i'd spend season on STT working ,well 2 months of febreeze was enough and i missed the other half and the 4 dogs so i came home.
I too enjoy your accounts TRW....makes me a little Leary though, with the apartment I have for rent ...lol
KJ, maybe that WAS mellow for her!
Great day off today with nothing more exciting to tell than I really enjoy taking a nap with this cool, breezy weather. Even the dog is sleeping more than usual. There's something eating our ficus shrubs & I heard it's really expensive to get them sprayed since our condo association let it go too long. 🙁
Stuck here in the desert Southwest, amid high/low, mostly low, these days, temperatures, I quite envy the daily 'struggles' you must endure to live in paradise. Been trying for years to get there any way I can. Maybe, someday, the paradise 'Gods' will shine kindly upon my and, I too, will be forthcoming with tales such as I read about from the islanders. Should anybody have any suggestions that I may not have tried, please feel free to advise.
Your loyal reader,
novanut
just got home from the 18 mile benefit job,i saw a deer with antlers on the drive home, i've seen alot of deer here but never one with antlers,cool, speaking of deer i've seen alot more than usual up here where i live, i'm thinking because someone poisoned the packs of wild dogs that used to roam at will up here a couple years ago and so the deer have fewer natural predators to thin them out, thats cool.
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