stx today,comments

Troy,
Planning on the 23rd

Linda

trw, you've once again lost my vote for your senate run! I really can't accept your acceptance of crack dealers. I can't see how an anonomous call to crimestoppers to turn in crack dealers would be hurting your man. Your man needs them out of his life, not you protecting his sources.
I've also been the victim of multiple home breakins from a local crackhead needing my things to supply his jones. If we just accept that there are more crack dealers around than we can count, without turning them in, how do we expect the police to stop the wave of crime? Dealing is not a requirement down here if you are a young guy! I've seen many stellar "young guys" here on island, so your blanket statement just doesn't fit.
have you ever thought about the possibility of a police reading your words here about crack rocks being in your house? What if they acted on that info and came busting in your door and arresting you both for having CRACK in your house. This is major felony business and you would both end up in Golden Grove. You'd probably lose both 1/2s of the house as well. Are you willing to go through all this before finally rolling over those devils selling Crack on our island?
Pick up the phone and help improve the situation. Get some of the crack off the streets, and help put the crack dealers behind bars!

"aqua i would never do that to him, never, and lol suppliers how many can you count, how many times have i @#$%& about all the dealers on company street, dealing is a requirement down here if you're a young guy"

trw...sorry, but it sounds like you are under the influence of a HUGE co-dependency where tim is concerned...and since you openly make statements sometimes about your own past addictions, and working to stay clean...sometimes if one is not stronger than strong...one can get sucked right back into the life. and from the way you say you cannot sleep for days at a time, and so...perhaps getting a chemical panel done on yourself would be helpful...just to see if yours are off just a tad...i know (because i was a hard drug and alcohol user) that sometimes, under stress, even though we are not using...the chemicals in our body react to the stress just as if we were using...please do this for yourself, so you can begin to rest...and for goodness sakes...you are life partners...you have the right to put him in a program against his will...at the least, against his will, he will have to stay thirty days...do this for YOURSELF...unless you enjoy the drama and stress tim tosses about...do it for YOU. i know you will prolly talk sheet to me or rant on me, but, because i have been there, i feel i can say it, because i see the signs. bless

no i won't,not at all aqua,he pays the mortgage so i don't have too, so he's useful to keep around

i found a book called "five diaries of teenagers who died in the holocaust", i really don't want to read it because well we all know how it ends but i will read it because it's important to remember and never forget

wow i just sat through an hour of little house on the prairie and actually enjoyed it,whats wrong with me

Who knows?*-)

trw, the point is to turn in crack dealers not TIM

HE PAYES THE MORTGAGE! A crack head drunk payes the mortgage while the sober guy cannot even get his car out of the shop and is up for days because he cannot sleep. Hmmm. Have any of you ever known a crack head. I guess the fumes from all the crack keeps him awake. Intellectually I guess it would be bad for you to watch him die. Keep on taking his rock, stealing his money and pouring his booze down the drain. It might work.

Trw, I do not know you but I have been following these threads for several months now. Most because I am moving to St Thomas in early October, and I have ask a few questions along the way and just observed. Trw, you were the one who I followed first, because of your day to day experience, your work, books,the homeless all the things you talked about. Somewhere down the path you got very frustrated and sad, because of the Tim. Trw, If you truly had any feelings for your life partner, you would not let him continue to do this to himself. You are enabling him. And just look at your own self, you know that you are worth more than the crap you have to put up with day to day, but I can see that you will never know this until you step out of this situation. You certainly could not be happy, is this what you want for the rest of your life. I hope the Tim will get some help,with your encouragement, but really it's up to him. Trw, it maybe time for you to take a new course in life, find some happiness, before the situation with Tim destroys you. The man loves his crack more than he loves you. What is sad , If you really loved him..........you already know what you need to do. I wish you all the best and hope you choose whats best for you.
I have been in your shoes many years ago and I chose what was best for me. Because when it came right down to it, I chose happiness, after I pleaded with my significant other time and again. He chose the drugs over me, may he rest in peace.

Trw, also what good is that mortgage payment, when he can't pay it anymore. Crackheads usually end up losing everything, unless he has a unlimited amount of funds to pay for his habit. And in that case, if you are going to stick around and put up with the day to day BS. Get a will, you will deserve something in the end. I hope for your sake Trw, you find happiness and peace. I also hope that Tim realizes what he has and things change for you too.

worried about u trw. u r walking on razor edge. no relief, no rest. please save yourself.

i was in a similar situation with my EX. he was into drugs and drink, he was also abusive ( which trw, i hope yours is not ). i also didnt know what i would do , where i would live. i also had a baby at the time. no marketable job skills just a high school education. i had to get out for my child and for me because i didnt want that life for us. sometimes we do stay in situations for financial situations but in the end they are not for the wellbeing of ourselves. i hope you make the right choice for you. good luck.
life is too short.
btw a good book is "god grew tired of us" it is about the lost boys of sudan.

My &#% crackhead story:

In Denver I was chef at a restaurant and I hired a young sous chef to work with me. Turns out, we were both looking for an apartment at the same time. It only made sense to get a 2 bedroom apt near work. All employees partied and had a good time but he took it a step further and started smoking that dirt. He functioned fine for a few weeks. Showed up to work, paid bills, contributed to the apartment, and had some skin color. But about a month in it all changed.

I would work the morning shift and he would relieve me at 4 p.m. to work the night shift. He began showing up late and eventually not showing up at all. I would call his cell phone, but it was shut off since he didn't pay. I would have to run home, wake him up, and escort him to work. At work, he started stealing cigarettes, booze, and eventually cash out of the office. I had to fire my roommate.

I didn't see him too much after that since I had to pull double shifts to cover for him. He didn't pay rent or utilities, invited strange people over (like homeless addicts to sleep on MY couch), and the last straw? He stole my Xbox, all games, controllers, DVDs, and my car stereo system that I uninstalled from an old car and had scheduled to install in my new car.

He denied it up and down and said he would never do that. But, a locked apartment is exactly that. Who could have? I filed a police report but didn't say that I suspected him.

I had a tough choice ahead of me. Do I call the police and tell them my roommate stole my shit and is here right now? Do I elbow drop him in the face while he sleeps on my couch all day? I did what I thought was right. I called his parents in Arkansas and told them his son was in the ditches and needed help. They drove straight over and we had an impromptu "intervention". When his parents showed up he was in his bedroom with 3 homeless men and I could smell the acrid smoke. It was really heavy to see the whole family break down around him. He admitted that he was addicted to crack. They packed up all of his stuff and just like that, he was gone. I had to break my lease and find a new apartment. I never asked for anything back. I never filed any charges.

When he arrived in Arkansas his family called. They passed the phone from brother to brother who were weeping and crying and so thankful to have their brother back and out of harms way. They offered me money, a new Xbox, anything I could think of. I just wanted him to get better. That was the last I ever heard of him or his family. All in all, I lost about $3000 between rent, deposit, and all of my goodies he stole. But, the worst part for me was watching his decline. He was funny, entertaining, and a great cook when I first met him. By the end, he was merely a shell. On the couch in a blanket, pale and skinny is how I remember him.

That's my &$#&*( crackhead story.
Noah

chefnoah, seriously way to go for calling his parents, i do hope it saved his life. my ex is clean now beacuse he had a drug/alcohol induced stroke at the age of about 41-42. he is now in a nursing home and has practically no movement on his left side and is wheelchair bound. if it wasnt for that he would still be hooked. i know though that if he were ever to get out of the nursing home he would be back to his old ways.

The decline into drugs is so fast. I had a brother with his master's degree working in Denver, his life seemed right on track. I don't think that any of us knew the extent of his drug problem until after his death. He became addicted to meth and committed suicide all within about 4 months. Bless you chefnoah for giving that family another chance.

Sorry about your brother. Meth is the worst one out there.

At the time I was so angry that I wanted to take a different route and make him face the consequences. But, I figured his parents could handle that part of it.

trw...nobody sees tears when you're standing in the storm.

trw

truly
we only say these things because we care about you.
we want you to have a chance at happiness in your coming years...
please understand that and do not be flippant when you choose to reply.
it is YOUR best interests that all of us have at HEART.
i do not even know you and i do not want this constant strain on your metabolism.
blessings and may HIM guide you and protect you and walk beside you...each and every step you take.

trw

truly
we only say these things because we care about you.
we want you to have a chance at happiness in your coming years...
please understand that and do not be flippant when you choose to reply.
it is YOUR best interests that all of us have at HEART.
i do not even know you and i do not want this constant strain on your metabolism.
blessings and may HIM guide you and protect you and walk beside you...each and every step you take.

Well said,

I personally have been through my own living hell and the best advice that I ever got was the simplest: "Put your best foot forward and hopefully it will lead you someday". Even in my biggest time of trouble that was simple enough for me. That was almost 20 years ago and what I have accomplished from that point astonishes me. I am just a simple person who is happy now.

Molly

trw,

I know that I will probably get some flack for this but I was always told that the best advice is to get rid of the things that will kill you first. Smoke a cigarette tonight if it makes you feel better. Although I have kicked some considerable habits, I still enjoy having a cigarette. Please no judgement here, I bet all of the posters that have given up something do resort to the last thing that we do agree will eventually kill them and the last thing on the chain of hard drugs is the cigarette.

Molly,
Don't tease me like that, I quit over 20 years ago, I'M weak and can't just have one, I miss it. When I am on my death bed I will smoke again.

so i talked to one of my aa friends last night, and he told me the tims problem is none of my business, i can't force him to do anything until he reaches his own personal bottom, lord knows he tried with me back in 02 and i walked all over him,so yes Trade and Lizard you are right and i knew all along you were but sometimes i have to beat my head against the wall before I believe, i work 16 hours tomorrow but on sunday i retake the veil and go back to meetings

Good for you, trw! I knew your brain would kick in & we always have to beat our heads against the wall sometimes.

so one of the wanna be politicians was in for bfast this morn and we've gotten to know each other pretty well over the last year, and today was the first time i've ever served him booze,the waitress brings him his drink and about 20 minutes later he comes back up to the bar and says TRW can you put some more rum in this and i looked at him and asked him you trying to get drunk today so and so and he says yeah it's my bday so i smile at him and asked him what he really wants for his bday and he blushed and then did the hand bump thing with me,lol in all my years i've never made a black guy blush until today lol and one of the members of this board just came back from minnesota and brought me some sweetcorn today at work which i am eating on right now and it tastes just like a minnesota summer, and it's odd 2 of my regulars are now judges down here so i wait on 3 judges during the course of the week and i no longer feel comfortable calling them by their first names like i've always done, they are now your honor, i still call all the senators by their first names cause well they're basically nobodies butthe judges are different for some reason

lol well i just got an email from my little sister and she says she's dumped her golf pro/restaurant golf shack manager up in minnesota and has moved to STT and is living with her mother over there and has been there for a week now and well i don't know if my leg is being pulled or not so i just sent my number 2 an email for confirmation, see what i started all those years ago my whole family is going to end up down here,god i'm going to have to move to israel or panama,lol just kidding,i hope it's true though