stx today,comments

http://www.intothedrink.tv/ i waited on these guys tonight, they are here filming for a week or so,3 of them,lol all really big guys,made me look like a midget,they were alittle dehydrated because they had spent the day over at cruzan rum filming stuff there lololol

longass 15 hour day today, one of my crucian guys came in today, we talked last week and he wanted me to help him find a 40 something girlfriend, white preferablly, and i said ok i'll help you if you help me find a new boyfriend and he said ok what color i said who cares as long as he's in his early 50's moderate with alcohol and drugs or free of it all and he said last week ok i don't drink or do drugs and i make 4 grand a month and i'm thinking dude are you auditioning or what and then he ate and left well today he came in all spruced up and he asked me "how do i look" and i said you look good and he LOLOLLOLOL said is that all? and i came back with well you have your little muscle shirt on you cleaned up your stache and you got a haircut and you look pretty hot,hahahahahha and then he was happy and i think to myself, you really need some gay guy to give you compliments when you're looking for a girlfriend,but lol he tipped me better than he usually does and i told him i'd see him on saturday and he said ok,lol i think i'm being courted

Damn, and here I was gonna put my name in the hat for him!

trw, u skank! 😎

Seems like more stores here should offer a "locals discount" program or something. I spent a good deal of time on Maryland's Eastern Shore and a lot of stores in the resort towns on the beach did this sort of thing. When on vacation people will pay more to have a keepsake, but in everyday life we all need to live within our means and a lot of places here make that difficult. I would gladly pay stateside + 4% GRT + shipping cost + a reasonable markup to get things here rather than go outside, but often the markup is over 20%!

Sean

sonyas gives a local discount alot of places will do it if you ask, and trust me i ask that alot, you need to say "what ??? i should pay tourist prices? i live here"

we have an older woman that eats with us everyday at the bar unless the young woman i work with is behind the bar,then she walks in looks and leaves,the young woman has never done anything wrong as far as i know and well i know everything and so it kinda bugs her in a weird sort of way and she was telling me this yesterday and sure enough older woman walks in looks and see's young woman behind the bar and leaves lol and young woman's feelings are hurt so i say well she's probably in love with you but knows ur straight and doesn't want her feelings hurt so she has nothing to do with you to protect herself,lol and my boss hearing all of this breaks up and tells me i'm fullofshit

but then again this is the same woman i tell all the time to watch out or she'll end up in some uppermiddleclass suburb somewhere as a stay at home mom and housewife out jogging at 5am and working out trying to stave off the fact that her husband is going to trade her in for a newer model while she's doing lunch and shopping all day long and lusting after the gas guy and he's screwing some shop girl somewhere,you know not in their social circle and she laughs and says that won't happen and i say yes it will, i've seen it happen time and time again,i've lived in those uppermiddlesclass enclaves

the book i'm reading now is the gargoyle,about of it takes place in a modern day burn unit in a hospitol and the other half takes place in a german nunnery in the 1300's,this is a great first novel!!!!

trw,

Loved that book! Keep reading, it has several wonderful stories within the main story of self discovery.

molly, i've got about 50 pages left so i'm trying to put it down so i don't finish it too fast, it's a wonderful book,really raw at first but then it mellows somewhat,and since i'm a guy you can imagine the part that really made my skin crawl,

finished the gargoyle,but then i started to read it again,and then i have john rechy's book "the sexual outlaw" which takesplacein1970's LA

when i reached that point where i knew i had to stop using drugs and alcohol it was 4am somewhere,4am is when you sober up or the drugs have run out,when you start to question what you've been doing for the last drug fueled years,i had made it to the point where i was using drugs to pay for sex,(i'll buy you put out) and i was tired, i was tired of being used for just the drugs,i was tired of guys"loving"me but just until the dope ran out,i was just plain old tired ofit allo, now that i've sobered up,i've discovered that i'm still tired

for some resom i ended up as a paranoid crack head the ex is not and still to this day is not but i am,i'd get freaked out right after the first hit,people were coming to kill me i just knew you were under my widow waiting to shoot me, i think it was because the guy i used to hang with was paranoid and so it rubbed off on meand so it ruined the whole trip,but yet i continued to smoke that first hit made my head explode and want more,too thisday i want more even though i know it's not a good thing and i know i'll not give in but jeez it's so hard sometimes i really want to get fuckedup

Go to a meeting. Call your sponsor.

yeah trade i know

some are sicker than others.......keep coming back

can't sleep so i'm reading the gargoyle,dude was sofucked up,before he started his journey to redemption and salvation,i've read the james frey books and i don't think he did anything other than cash in and try to shock and well oprah took him down,i know i harp on alot about redemption and i'm not sure why,i think it's the right thing to do, i had to chase off one of my homeless guys the other day,he was getting too needy and i felt like shitdoing it but it had to be done,ahfuck it's just one of those nights when i have to fight my demons to get through the night,gotta get past 4am and i'll be fine

you know we play the hand we're dealt,when i lost my parents i lost that guiding factor,you know that wisdom of been there done that and so my whole life has been a life of going my own way, alot of bad choices a few good ones,i've read the john rechy book a few times over the years and i keep going back to it because it describes most of what i feel all of the time,that rage and anger that somehow is always kept just below the surface, the stuff thats hidden behind the smile

)

trw,
Not trying to be a smartass, but it sounds to me like you just need a vacation.

yeah a vacation would be good,but from what,i'm watching claras heart right now and i wonder if neil patrick harris knew then that he'd grow up to be a professional faqg,the ex just got off the couch from being passed out and went to bed and well i did my best to needle him on the way,lol fun for me on the one hand i love him like i've never lovedanyone in my life on the other hand i hate his fuckingguts cause he has noballs

and one more thing, the stuff i write and talk about on here is stuff i'd never ever talk or speak about in public, to me this is an avenue of communication, of talking to people without ever having to deal with people

heres another story i've never talked about. one day i was driving home from over the hill and a cop had the nerve to pull me over,lol no tags no license no insurance no nothing and i told him i had no nothing and he told me to just go home and i said i was doing just that until you pulled me over,what he didn't know was that i had a mouthfull of crack that i swallowed so i wouldn't get busted and when i got home i puked up in the bathtub and sorted through my puke to find those 3 rocks i'd swallowed

ok i've been up for 3 days now,can't sleep, mind is wandering too fuckingmuch,my dogs won't even talk to me anymore,the boy dog that usually needs the most attention just ignors me right now,i need sleep but it eludes me most nights,i can usually go for about 6 days before i collapse, my mind goes too fast and never really allows my body to shut down

We finally arrived back on island Saturday afternoon. It always takes me a while to adjust to being here again and I have a hard time sleeping for the first few days along with an out of body feeling. No such problem for JJ. He woke up at 4 am Saturday morning ready to go happier than I have seen him in weeks. When we were ready to land on STX he let out a yell, "Mommy, mommy, there's our island"!!!!!!!!!!! He then proceeded to tell everyone that this was our island and we were not leaving again for a long time. We have hardly heard a peep out of him since. He is busy exploring, so happy to be home. The sweetest thing was observing him watching pregnant daughters tummy waiting to see the baby move. He ever so gently puts his hand on her tummy and giggles. We will be very sad when she goes back to the states. Those two are very close.