Questions about relocating

I forgot to ask about fing a job in the off season. Is it possible, or better yet likley?

Hi April,

Before I say anything, there is a disclaimer. I too am new to the site (less than a year) and will be making the move this July. From all the posts I've read, I know its not the most ideal time to move, but its the only time that works best for me.

I have bought the Settler's Handbook and it was a good start. The Handbook is good because it mentions important things one should know about island life. Its a quick read but is not nearly as comprehensive as I have found this forum.

May I ask where you are relocating from?

Thanks for responding. We are moving from Ohio. I ordered the settlers Handbook online, but it has not come yet. I read most of your post and wish you good luck. Just out of curiosity how did you get hired before making a pmv. We most likley won't make one.

hi april,

first of all, best of luck! i want to say, i have read many posts where board members discourage parents from bringing their children to the vi, i would not be surprised if you receive similar sentiments. i will say however, my boyfriend was brought to the vi by his parents when he was two and has lived there since. now, understand that i love the guy so my opinion will be biased but, i think that being raised on an island has greatly contributed to his fascinating world view. he is a wonderful person with an interesting perspective... i think alot of this has to do with his unique upbringing. his parents are not independently wealthy yet they managed to send him to private schools. long story short, they made it work. just wanted to offer you a bit of encouragement on your endeavor.

erin

Hey April,

WOW thats a big move. From snowy Ohio to the warm Caribbean. What encouraged you to make the move?

Well I haven't secured a job just yet. I have been debating between teaching or not. I have been communicating with the department of education. I haven't decided what I will do yet. I think I might spend the first 4-6 months getting to know the island and being a waitress or something (Something to pay the rent) and then after I feel comfortable with my housing situation and everything I will become a permanent teacher unless I find something more interesting.

Teaching pays about $28,000 for someone with no experience but has a bachelor's. thats enough to pay my bills and travel during the breaks.

If you have it in your craw that you have to do this, then you won't be satisfied until you do. Your baby isn't school-aged & won't be for a while & by that time you will know whether the VI is for you. I don't know the differences between the pay rate between STT & STX but I'm sure others will be able to fill you in on that.

Good idea to save up because you definitely will need it. What does your husband do for a livelihood? You'll be in for sticker shock so plan on living simply until you find your niche. Best of luck!

If you are living paycheck to paycheck etc in Ohio, have you considered what the increased cost of living etc is going to be like for you in the VI? IMHO, It is significantly harder for families with children to make it in the VI without jolly healthy wages, some cash reserves - at least 10K.
If you can't afford a PMV - don't move here. Wait until you have made some financial headway in life. What if you absolutely hate it there and can't afford to return to the States...?

Post like yours are why I asked people not to be critical. I thought this board was for information and support not judgment. If you had my entire post you would see that I have researched moving, so to answer you, yes I have considered the increased cost of living. In addition I also stated that we plan on having a cash reserve. I would not consider the move without one. As for your snobbish statement "if you can't afford a PMV, don't move here". I did not say anything about being able to afford it I said it was not feasible. There are numerous reasons, money being the least of them, why we will most likely not do a PMV. I was not aware that I owed you personally an explanation, you will not be responsible for my bills. As for my statement about living paycheck to paycheck, I live in a rural area where most of the jobs are factory which I hate. I am a skilled bartender and server and I almost always make more in tips than my co workers, however this is an area where people just do not tip that much. I work hard and do not take anything for granted. I assume that if I can make a living doing this here than I can bartending for tourist. And finally we will not be leaving behind anything that is not easily replaced if we move back. We have planned to put money up for return to the states, in case things do not work out. TO all of those who have positive things to say. I hope I have not offended anyone, I just felt that this response was harsh and judgemental. please feel free to offer any constructive advice that is not in the nature of "if you can't afford a PMV, don't move here". We are very excited and MOST of the information on this site has been encouraging and in good spirits.

Dear April,

As much as you really don't want to hear negatives, I almost feel apologetic about saying that in my opinion this won't be a good move for you at this juncture in your life. Once you have your baby your priorities will probably change quite drastically but if the urge is still with you during that first year of your baby's life, do continue to research this forum to the nth degree,

You may well find that the unspoken and unwritten is testament to the difficulties of living here. Probably close to 75% of the newcomers who've posted on this forum over the last couple of years are no longer here and that should probably tell you something. Cheers and all the best to you!

Thank you for your advice. We plan on spending the next year researching before we move. I feel that this will be the best time in our child's life for such a drastic move. We feel that being so young, we will not be pulling her away from as many attachments and we do not have to worry about issues with school. We will wait until we are there for awhile before deciding if we will stay permanently. As of right now I fell nothing ventured = nothing gained. We really do not have anything to loose by following our hearts. I feel that this is best time in our life. We are young able and willing to work hard. Please understand I do want to hear the negatives about the move so that I can be prepared. The main reason I was perturbed about the previous statement was the comment "if you can't afford a pre-move visit do not move here". I felt that person was saying I would be unwelcome because I am not rich. I am not naive or dumb in any way I realize what I am undertaking. That is why we are planning to move a year from now. This will not be something we jump into head first. Again that you for your concern I know you are well- intentioned.

April you will get some positive views and some negative views and everything in between. Please don't think that people are criticizing you, or being mean to you just because they say things that don't fit into your view. If you had not wanted opinions, you would not have asked for them. Not everyone is going to say something you want to hear. Jane had a very good point about making a PMV. If you can not make a PMV, for whatever reason, it might be a good idea to consider putting off the move until you can make it. You can do all of the research in the world, ut you will still not know what it is truly like until you are here. No one was saying you would not be welcome if you do not have money... trust us, a lot of us live hand to mouth... BUT, a PMV is very important and Jane was trying to help you see that if you can not do a PMV, then you will be truly sorry if you get down here and decide you hate it and can't do anything about it.

April: Do your due diligence. Don't burn your bridges (i.e. don't sell everything and move here- leave some stuff in storage back home.) Plan to stay for some set period- 6 months, a year- and re-evaluate. If it doesn't work out, you can always move back. No big deal! 😉

April: Jane's response and yours back popped up while I was responding, I don't always agree with Jane but I thought her response to your post was more informational than judgmental. Suggesting that potential relocaters make a PMV is almost a byline in the "help" department and I really don't think you should have interpreted Jane's comment as being at all "snobblsh." Maybe a bit terse but on point, in my opinion.

I think you'll generally find very valid, helpful and responsible answers to your questions on this forum but an outpour of warm hands and "Welcome Wagon" hugs and goodies isn't going to be any kind of norm. Don'r mistake "advice" for which you've asked for negative criticism.

This forum is all about trying to give potential newcomers a wide perspective of living and working in the USVI from an array of viewpoints. Cheers!

IMHO,priority's do change when children come into our lives.You begin to think of other people more, 'like your child.'Raising a kid in the Caribbean other than rural Ohio doesn't sound so bad to me.April you have nothing to lose,If it doesn't work it doesn't work.GO FOR IT!!!!! My wife and I are doing our PMV in may then moving in oct to STX.Not escaping just changing and can't wait to do it.April I have been lurking on this board for a long time,most of the people that post even when it sounds negative mean well,they know what it takes to get there.I have learned a lot from the positive and negative posts properly more from the negative ones.It won't be all sunshine,blue water and diving but there is a lot more of that STX than where I'm from.I will let you know how it goes good luck with your adventure!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thank you all for your comments. I want you to know that I am taking everything in. While my opinion of Jane's assumptions still holds true, I do not want anyone to think I cannot take criticism or that I only want to hear positives. I am just hoping for support. Nothing in Jane's statement was supportive and she made several judgments on my situation that were unnecessary. Something that I thought had made clear but obviously I haven't (I am not meaning this in any sort of rude way) is that I have many reasons for not wanting to do a PMV. Our move down is our PMV. If things do not work out, then we pack up and come back. Trust me when I say that we are not burning bridges back home. We are bringing a cash reserve with us. We are also keeping the money back for return flights in a separate account. We are going to pay for a month or two of short term housing up front before we even arrive. We literally have nothing to loose. Anyway I just wanted to say thank you for your points of view and rest assured we will not be fool hearted.

Heck, my PMV consisted of an overnight & I was back in a week's time. I didn't have a baby with me but this was long before the internet, relocation forums and anyone's advice, yea or nay. It's doable. We all did it. You can too but if it's not for you, it sounds like you're well-prepared & will just get on a plane & go back. This isn't Timbuktu.

April - I understand where you're coming from. My husband and I just moved down here a month ago from Michigan. We did a PMV, but it was also a job interview. I think we learned a lot, but nothing we couldn't have learned through books or on this board. We saw what life was like down here and while it is different it wasn't enough to scare us away. I don't think a PMV is necessary. Just like anywhere it's going to look nice visiting for a week, it's only after you've been here for awhile that you start to see the problems. I don't have children, but I don't see that as being a problem for you down here. The selection in the stores is a bit limited so say your baby needed a special formula or something then you might not be able to get it here. Our biggest expense in moving was having to come up with rent money (first, last, and security deposit). We were able to find a furnished apartment which I'd highly recommend as it's saved us having to go out and buy everything new right away. I don't know how much bar tenders make around here. From what I've read most jobs tend to pay a little less here then they would in the states. My job luckily is about the same. I think you could make it just fine down here. We sat down and figured out a budget before we decided to make the move figuring the more expensive costs of things here (rent, groceries, etc.). Sure things are a little tighter, but you learn to live a "simpler" life. Hope that helps you a little.

April: We'll all look forward to hearing from you again after you've had your baby. Even amongst all the moving stories and from over two decades here of personal experience of comers and goers I can't conjure up one story of someone moving here with a baby and making a "go" of it unless they had serious financial backup.

Conversely, many young couples who make a "go" of it here leave when their child is one or two years old and then of course the percentage grows quite drastically as children reach even basic school age and parents realize there is no way they can afford the private schooling which unfortunately is a "must" here, at least now.

"Bardsley's" boyfriend was born and raised here but apparently had the advantage of parents who were sufficiently affluent to enable them to register him in an expensive private school system here. That private school system is, to say the least, worth every penny but we're talking megabucks.

But if you're right now living from paycheck to paycheck, this move without a serious PMV and with a young baby in tow is, in my opinion,a disaster in the making. In my opinon, you need to set yourself back a bit, work on giving birth to your child and developing relationships within your family base.

Maybe I'm swerving way off base here but it seems to me that you have some personal unresolved issues relating to your marriage, your pregnancy and your relationshp with both your parents and your in-laws.

Cheers!

Something to think about april child care is very expensive here. Are you both planning to work to make it? You might find childcare will eat up your paycheck here. So when budgeting you should try to see if you can make it on one salary. And imo Jane was spot on. It is so hard to make it here and find a job with a good income unless you have skills that are in demand. Bartending in the islands is not going to get you health benefits down here. Medical care is going to be expensive and not anywhere near as good as you've got it now. You will make more money with bartending in stt or at least have more options for jobs. Everything cost more here except the liquor. You will find you cut back on everything and you're still spending more then you did stateside. As people have already said, have an exit plan. More people leave then stay here, just remember that when you listen to all the advice from the newbies. 🙂

Thank you all for your advice and those of you with positive wishes thank you for your support. To STT resident I am really confused as to why you assume I have so many "unresolved issues". My pregnancy was planned we tried for a year before we were successful, so where you got an idea there were any issues there well.I am confused. I have As for my marriage... we have been together for five years and are still going strong. We are both excited about this new chapter in our lives together. My father passed away when I was 10 so good call on that there are definitely issues when you loose a parent that young. My mother lives in another state, so we only see each other at holidays, but talk on the phone a lot. I have always been independent. And as for my in laws, I just feel that they love a little to much and do not want us to be far away. They have good intentions but my husband and I are free spirits and we need some more space. I feel really sorry for you if you are so jaded that anyone who has a wandering soul and wishes to see more of the world than what they are used to has issues. I do not want to look back in ten or twenty years when my children are in school and we are to committed and have regrets about what I could have done. I may be taking this to personally, but your post nearly left me in tears. That you would presume to judge my family relationships and my feeling towards my unborn child who I have planned for and wanted for so long breaks my heart. Maybe I was wrong to think that the locals in the Virgin Islands are welcoming to people like myself. I posted on this site for advice not judgment on things that personal. I know I am being defensive. My husband said I should just ignore it and find a new site. But I am amazed that by asking similer questions as others have on this site, I should ignore such harsh judgments from a stranger.

OK April, Here is my positive only, warm and fluffy response to your post in which you detailed your lack of finances etc.
.............Congratulations on your expected child.
I am sorry that you were offended by my post. However, my advice was sound. The successful relocations are usually - young, single and fancy free...couple with no kids etc - older people whose kids have moved on and want an adventure - retirees with money - and then people with families and the financial wherewithal to make living in the VI feasible and pleasant.
Your own description did not seem to fit into any of these. I was not the only responder who foresaw problems in yr plan.
There are exceptions to every rule -I sincerely hope that you will be one. I am sorry that you chose to categorize me as snobbish. Remember you are contemplating relocating to a very expensive part of the world. Without an island family support system, living paycheck to paycheck with a young child in the VI could well be the loneliest and most stressful thing that you have ever experienced.
Cheap places to rent are not the norm - not ones where you can raise a baby in comfort and safety.
I sincerely wish you luck, but caution you NOT to move without a PMV.

April we know you're pregnant and maybe that is why you are taking good advice as criticism. People are not trying to hurt you but prepare you. It is hard to make it here, and it is much harder with a child. You will understand if you do come that no one is lying to you are trying to hurt you but telling you the truth. How did you make it nyc if this board is making you cry? Buck up and listen to the advice. I personally haven't had any other couple friends with a kid make it here (some had a good income some didn't), but obviously people manage. I understand you have made it in nyc where it is expensive but the problem here is while its expensive the jobs here do not keep up with the cost of living. It's hard for some of us to give you the go for it because we do care about the child you would be bringing down. Really read through all the pages of the forum and read the advice of other mothers.

April,

I know we are not saying what you want to hear, but it's all true.

Let me be more practical. Here's what I think you will need to move here:

$10,000 in cash. Most rentals will want first, last and one month's security. So for a $1,000 rental, you'll need $3,000 up front. You'll also need deposits for utilities, say $300. You will need a car - you can bring yours if it's paid for - shipping, taxes etc maybe $2,000. Or you can buy one on-island, same cost. You'll need the other $5,000 to set up housekeeping and live on until you find work. Plan on a furnished rental, but you will want to ship some of your personal belongings.

Your family income here will need to be around $50,000 a year to live comfortably and safely . Trust me, it will. Do you plan to work? What childcare arrangements will you make? If you do work, you'll need a second car. With a baby you will also need health insurance, another expense if your employer doesn't provide, and most don't.

I would suggest you bring a clean credit card with a limit of at least $3,000 - $4,000. This will provide you with an emergency fund, necessary if you need to get back to the states quickly. Plan on plane fare averaging $500 - $700 per person, more if you have to book within a day or two of flying.

I'm sorry you feel we are not welcoming. But if all you wanted was reassurance that you've made the right decision, you've come to the wrong place. Those of us who post here take our "job" seriously. If it were just you and your husband, our comments would have been different, but with a child to consider, the situation changes.

I am assuming from your posts that you've never visited the Virgin Islands, is that correct? If so, I have to agree with Jane, make a pre-move visit or reconsider moving here.

Whatever you decide, good luck.

I am sure my being pregnant has something to do with my teary reaction. I can take advice and I have searched through many of the old postings. That is the reason I am so surprised. I have read so many supportive posts to other people. I do not mean to be rude, but if you are worried about my child then you should be more worried about the small rural area I live in now. In this area the choices are fast food minimum wage jobs and factory work. I am a skilled bartender, but in order to make good tips I have had to drive for an hour and a half to work. PS I do not know where the confusion has come from I have never lived in NYC. I visited there when living in New Jersey. We are looking at moving regardless, we wanted to move somewhere new and somewhere where we could experience more. I have done a lot of research and I will continue to do more. I have to say I am completely shocked that you are more worried about my reaction than the comments that upset me. The only comment that made me want to cry was the attack on my personal life because I wish to relocate. To say that I have issues with my marriage and pregnancy because I want to start a new chapter in my life is unbelievable. In the many many hours I have spent searching through old post I have not really come across much of that. I guess what strikes me the most absurd is that only a few people have actually answered the questions of my original post.

TO Jane, I apologize if I reacted to strongly to your post. As my mother is quick to quote sometimes its not what your saying but how you're saying it. Your post had no introduction, no warmth at all. You said nothing positive in your initial post. I guess I just assumed that if it were that impossible to move there then I would not have found so many positive stories on this board. Nothing is perfect I do not expect it to be. I believe that I can make things work and I am willing to work hard. I can offer my child my child more by exposing her to more than a small town with no real culture.
I do mean to sound rude, but aside from suddenly becoming a millionaire I do not understand what more some of you who have posted think I should do. I plan on having a cash reserve as well as money put aside for a return ticket if things do not work out. I plan on paying for short term housing before I arrive. Anyway I think this post got out of hand. I just wanted answerers to a few questions, not a commentary on my life and how strangers think I should live it. I am a strong person and I have persevered in my life I deserve to make my dreams come true just as much as the next person. My husband and I will find out everything we need to know. Again I wish to thank those of you who have offered advice, constructive criticism, and support.