Confession of Someone Moving Back to the States

You have written a wonderful and honest account of your experience.

You have no need to apologize to anyone. Whenever you make a decision there is always the chance that you or or needs will change.

Most people would agree with your assessment of the USVI and with your need make a change in plans.

Some people leaving here phrase their words in anger. They say they are angry at all of the "failings" on StThomas, but they are really angry with themselves for making a wrong decision. You seem to have put things in a better perspective.

Best of luck in the future. Maybe you will come back as a visitor who really knows the islands.

Hello,

Your write up is welcomed, thank you for sharing. Often times folks that return to the mainland do not share their reasons. Your story was honest and completely understandable.

I think its great that you are taking a month to explore - wonderful. I wish you all the best in your travels and hope you will share those experiences too (as we have a travel site and message board also).

Might you answer a few questions (that I have seen frequently from prospective residents)...

Did you have a hard time finding an apartment? What did you think of the selection, price?

Do you think a car is necessary for getting around?

Did you feel welcomed, feel any descrimination as a new resident/non-islander?

Having experienced what you have, do you think you would do it again? Was it positive overall and worth doing?

Were you able to meet people, make friends? Where did you meet others your age?

Could you describe your impression of the job situation a bit more?

What are some suggestions, tips you would have for someone considering this move?

Again thank you for sharing your story. All the best with your future plans!

--Islander

Islander,
Man, I feel like i could seriously write a book about our experiences down here. It's hard for anyone who has never lived here to relate in the slightest to the "bad parts" about island living. I do not have one friend or family member who feels any true sympathy when i've expressed frustration ("oh poor you on your tropical island", "why don't you just sell coconuts on the beach if you're broke?", etc), and to be honest, i wouldn't have listened before I moved here either. You just have to go through it to understand. So i don't expect any of you who are posting for advice on your upcoming moves to the VIs to really listen to me because I was in your shoes not so long ago and I know how much the enticements of paradise override any hesitations that might be in your mind. So come, enjoy, make up your own mind. I only speak for myself. By no means do I expect my experiences to reflect general experiences, although i would not be surprised in the slightest if most of you living here said, "me too" to a lot of things I'll detail below.

Did you have a hard time finding an apartment? What did you think of the selection, price?
We were lucky and got an apartment set up for us before we came due to my fiance's job. We lived in a little apt below a house in Mandahl (the prettiest part of the island in my opinion! wow, killer views like you would not believe). We loved our apartment, although it was small (1 brm), we had a nice big kitchen and huge porch with BBQ, table & chairs, hammock, punching bag... and the view was amazing. We paid $850 which included utilities which i think is a steal. The main part we didn't like about our apt was living so close to neighbors. Always interacting with them (they were really nice, but it was a little too much togetherness), their kids coming down and wanting to play with our dog, etc. Someone else may really like that neighborliness... Overall, i think we had it great, but the "small town" neighborliness drove my fiance crazy, he felt like we didn't have much privacy there. We realized it'd have been near impossible for us to ever move with a dog, so we felt a little trapped in our living situation.

Do you think a car is necessary for getting around?
Absolutely, 100% without any hesitation, YES. (coming from someone who lived without a car for 5 yrs before moving here). and a decent car (with 4 wheel drive) that won't break down. As we learned it takes FOREVER if you have to send your car to the shop (2 weeks for them to diagnose our Jeep's problem when it stalled out one day and wouldn't restart. ended up just being a dead battery, but it took them 2 weeks to realize that.) don't get a beater or you'll be miserable dealing with fixing it.

Did you feel welcomed, feel any descrimination as a new resident/non-islander?
I felt very welcomed by other statesiders who'd moved down here. They invited us places (mainly people we met via work), suggested places to eat and drink, and made an effort to get to know us. the west indians didn't pay us much attention and we never were able to make many friends since they seemed to have a "oh, they're just statesiders who won't live here long" attitude. of course, who can blame them, since here i am moving back after less than a year. in general the people born and raised here were less friendly to us, and yes we got some rudeness from the Kmart workers, but overall the people here are fine. I did feel weirdness while interviewing for jobs, but i'll write about that below.

Having experienced what you have, do you think you would do it again? Was it positive overall and worth doing?
Um.... yes. I say that hesitantly because hindsight is 20/20, but overall i think this experience was great. I love to travel, love experiencing new cultures, loved the chance to live in a foreign country (beleive me, this US Territory ain't nothing like the states!), loved the boats and the water and the snorkling and the soft white sand. I don't know that i would do it again knowing that i'd be leaving so soon, because moving is a B*tch and very expensive and i gave up a pretty good job to come here... moving 2x in less than a year is just really hard. however, i am very very confident that i will never regret this time, never wish i hadn't done it, never tell people "don't go to st thomas", and most likely i'll be wishing i was still sitting on Lindquist beach with my doggie all winter long. I wish i'd had more real concrete honest advice from people before coming here though. i wish someone had told me a lot of the stuff (that again, i would probably have tuned out) about how hard it is living here. about where to take your car when it breaks down, why people are rude to you, why no one seems to give you a heads up about tough situations like the 4 hrs it took me to get a cell phone from an otherwise empty radioshack (very much a sink or swim attitude here)... i still cannot fathom why it took 4 hrs when i was the only customer. 🙂

Were you able to meet people, make friends? Where did you meet others your age?
yes, we met some people. made a few friends, but none of those "we'll be friends for life" kind of friends. We met a lot of people younger than us (18-20ish), and a lot of people in their 40s raising families. but not too many people our age (28) and who we felt we could relate to. we met some Antilles School grads who grew up here and lived here as adults, and frankly couldn't really relate to their rich-kid, boat owning, yacht club hanging-out lives. we found the bar scene to be a bust (boring or filled with 18 yr old kids). i blame ourselves for not putting ourselves out there more though-- i've sort of burned out on the bar scene the last couple years and haven't really found a good social circuit other than bars for meeting people. i also blame myself because i was surprisingly homesick for MY parents and MY friends. i wanted them here to experience STT with me, and was disappointed that not many people visited due to how expensive it is to fly here/hotel costs, etc. anyway, i think my attitude had to do with me not making more friends.

Could you describe your impression of the job situation a bit more?
this is tricky, and hard for me to detail without probably causing some offense. but oh well. you asked! i am the type of person who has never NOT had my choice of jobs-- i choose where i want to work, not the other way around! 🙂 i was under the assumption that i had a ton of business related skills, that i was god's gift to any office, that my tough work ethic would blow everyone away, that i would be snatched up in a second because of my wit and charm and fabulous skills. WRONG. dead wrong. (of course would never approach a potential employer with that kind of cocky attitude, just being silly here.. you know what i mean). Seriously though, i am a great worker with lots of experience, glowing references and in fact my job in the states was begging me to come back... Anyway, my education and wealth of corporate world knowledge did me no good here. I could barely get an interview. it was either "too qualified" or "we are looking in the $7.hr range". i seriously could not believe the job scene. Many jobs are just word of mouth, it's about knowing people who say, "oh i know someone who might be hiring"...so that was hard too. It is my opinion that most employers here do not value their employees-- or they don't value their good employees at least. my fiance was stunned that it was routine for his coworkers to just not show up for work-- for days at a time without calling! they never got fired because there was no one else to hire, they never got reprimanded "oh i guess Pat's just off island or something"... no one worked hard, there were tons of mistakes made, and the employers just seem to have a 'well i know so-and-so isn't a great worker, and i know there must be more efficient ways of doing things, but this is the way they've always been done, and i don't want to pay a more qualified person to do the job". it's that simple. i went from a 50K a year job scene to $9 and $10/hr job offers with no insurance. i know 50K isn't millionaire status, but i could pay my bills and make rent and generally afford to shop or go out somewhere nice. if my fiance hadn't had a good job, i would have been so screwed. he paid my share of the rent several times, pays for most stuff actually simply because i don't make enough other than to barely cover my student loans and bills and rent. i've never been someone to ever rely on another person for money (esp a man!!), so it was very humbling. i never wanted to waitress or bartend because i'm not a night person and because it would have meant i'd have an opposite schedule from my fiance and then we'd have been really bummed. Also, there are certain institutions like the banks where i just felt like i wouldn't be hired regardless. i guess it was maybe reverse discrimination? my coworker who also moved down here around the same time as me was actually told, "we don't think you'd fit in here, despite your qualifications. i don't think the other girls would be very nice to you or view you as part of the team"... she would have been the only white person in the banking office. my fiance felt equally trapped because there were no other job options for him either-- he was in a better paying job albiet, but not one he enjoyed, and since he was under contract, he was stuck too. there just aren't enough jobs to be picky.
ANyway, it's not my point to blame west indians or mock the business standards here, but i was not impressed with the professionalism in general and the job scene sucked. do not come here if you're career oriented (unless you have a plan for a boating company or soemthing like that) or i think you'll be disappointed. i was. i tried to just enjoy everything else other my sad job, but when you have to put in 40 hrs a week, you can't help but feel down over it. it's not like i was chilling at the beach 24/7 -- trust me, i wish i could have! I don't think i'm alone in this experience-- most recent arrivals seem to really struggle with finding work. i told myself i'd do any kind of crap job to get by just to have the chance to live here, and i was kidding myself. although, i'm glad to have had the chance to live here, so i guess it was all worth it. (see those rosey lenses already)

Hi *Gasp*

Love the user name, and really appreciated the post for the same reasons Islander listed. I personally don't know how anyone could be upset with you for telling us you've figured out who you are and what you wanted out of life, and savored the experience of island life even if it wasn't something you wanted for the long run. Of course, having said that, I've pretty much ensured that some yahoo will leave you a nasty post of some sort. Sorry about that in advance.

In reading your reasons for wanting to head back to the mainland, I realized that I wouldn't have been happy here either had I moved while I was in my late 20's. I, too, have always thought of myself as an urban child, and lived my social life out in bars playing pool, dancing, and generally chilling with friends well into my 30's when I first got married. It's only been after years of marriage that I became a homebody and found myself preferring to be at home with my spouse over being anywhere else in the world. Moving to STX after I'd had all of the cutting edge music, eating out at ethnic restaurants, and generally being in the center of what's happening in the world that I needed is really the only time in my life that I could be happy being this far away from so many things that are taken for granted on the mainland.

I do hope that those considering a move read your insights and take them to heart. However, I think you're right that there's a certain level of excitement and a feeling that "we're different" that make a lot of people immune to the warnings that the USVI isn't just the US with better weather and a lot of beaches.

Congratulations for finding the self-awareness about what you want out of life -- a lot of people I know never really figure that out, or catch on to it very/too late in the game to make the most of it (such as after being diagnosed with cancer). I hope you enjoy your time exploring before you head back, and wish you the best as you pursue your personal and professional goals. Who knows -- maybe you'll also reach a point where you find the lifestyle you left here better suits your needs and we'll see you down in the USVI again.

Best,
HipCrip

Great Post,
Should be required reading for anyone considering a move to the Islands. While this is paradise, it is not paradise for everyone. I love it but for me it is only temporary. If I thought it was permanent I would nit pick the place to death and have many of the concerns you listed.
Good luck back on the mainland.

Great posts! I love honesty. I have posted about my highs and lows about moving here. I am still satisfied with moving here, but in the back of my mind I still consider us temporary residents of the islands. Of course, ask me on a day that I have spent on the beach on St. John and I will deny the former sentence. My first months on island were hard for me and I wanted to move back to the mainland about 6 days of the week. Now, I don't want to move back until I really feel we are ready. I am finally enjoying the island and actually it would hurt to leave. I am in my early 30's, but married with kids. Had I moved here before kids, I don't think I would have stayed. However, who knows? I think it is very important for people moving here to have a pre move visit and just to try it for themselves. I too, was so excited to move here that I didn't listen to the posts about the hardships of island life. I even laughed about 'heavy traffic' or traffic jams on the island. I fought rush hour on highways for 10 years and thought I knew all. I swallowed my pride a while back when I almost missed a job interview, because of *gulp* heavy traffic on island. 🙂

Gasp, have a Starbucks coffee while sitting in a huge bookstore, go to a Target, Bath and Body Works, hit a shoe sale at the mall, and think of us on island wishing we could do that. I think I miss Wal-mart most of all. Sigh, everything I need in one store at low prices - does it really exist? 🙂 Work hard and then come back for vacation with friends. Almost everyone I know who came on vacation or cruise - wished they could have brought all their friends. And I also agree, it is near impossible to explain island life to those who have not experienced it. I got no sympathy when I complained either. Good luck in all you do. Good for you for vacationing before leaving. It is like having dessert. You are full and ready to go home, but leaving with a sweet taste in your mouth!

Teresa

Man, what a great thread!! I really appreciate *Gasp's* honesty, and the replies and remarks from everyone else. More or less what I've been looking for while exploring the possibility of making my own move down there, although I'll not be deterred!! I've been thinking it's my time in life to see what else is out there and what I might find that suits me as I approach 37. I just realized times a wastin'. We'll call it my epiphany.

I live in Atlanta... a city filled with it's own brand of variety. We've got a "cutting edge music scene" (which I've played drums in for years), easy access to whatever goods or services you might want, great super markets, farmers markets, awesome restaurants, dirt cheap flights out of the worlds busiest airport, booming construction (my bag), job opportunities, etc..., but I'm just ready to go. Maybe not a permanent move, but I'm ready to commit for a year, at least.

So... I'm saving some cash, selling off some stuff, trying to make some contacts (socially and for work), and getting ready to make the plunge. The only concern I have, and it's been highlighted by *gasp's* remarks, has to do with the job market. As I mentioned, I'm in construction (electrical), so I'm hoping things may be different in that arena, as far as opportunity and wages, so... I'll see. Finding the day job will be top priority and I'm hoping to land a weekend job with a dive operator, hauling gear, tanks, or whatever, for tips and free diving (my ulterior motive for moving).

I know I'll miss my favorite restaurants, but thankfully I'm a great cook, so when I'm in the mood for Chinese, Italian, Thai, or Indian... I'll make it! Might have trouble finding all my ingredients for that Panang red curry or chicken vindaloo, but I'm sure I'll manage. Having a good support network here in the States will help, too.

I did have a question on the topic of cars. Exactly how necessary are they??? I've been under the impression I could easily bike just about anywhere I need to go. Is this not the case? I know a lot depends on where I live and work, so maybe I need to sort that out when I get there. Wrong thread, anyway.

Thanks again, *Gasp*, for the honest post. It definitely made me think about a lot of things as I prepare for my own move. Keep those Rosey shades on!!

I know you did not want to get a jod bartending or waitering, but if you wanted to how hard would it have been to get a job in the bussiness

Gasp,
Nice, honest post. I agree with those who say it should be required reading for those considering coming to the USVI. You made some points that I have tried to explain to many folks considering moving here. We live on STX, but I think it has some of the similar ailments as STT. This is a tough place to live if you have to make a living. We are fortunate in that we are retired and two big issues are taken care of. Our pensions and investments give us enough money to live on and we have health insurance. Having those things removes a lot of the stress and pressure.
One comment my wife always makes is "wherever you are, there you are". Basically, she's saying that island life won't cure your problems. It just means the weather is nicer.
Good luck. Come visit some time.

Ric

Gasp, thanks for taking the time to post the most insightful post I have EVER read on this board!

You have looked deep inside yourselves, around you and definately formed solid opions about what works for your lives.

As a person in his 60's I can tell you for a fact, that if more folks your age, made the kind of an honest assessment about their lives that you have, they'd most assuredly be a whole lot happier by the time they got to be my age.

Who's to say you won't go through this soul searching at another point along your journey, but I applaud the depth of understanding that you have reached at this point.

Best of luck in your life's journey.

Thanks for taking the time to share.

Thanks for all the supportive comments from everyone on the board. I didn't even get one nasty post from anyone, so to all you people who are planning moves down here, there are plenty of nice, supportive, open minded people living down here!

I must confess that I have not always been so positive and self reflective while living here-- many a moment of total frustration and cursing and feeling sorry for myself (I guess we all get like that at times). But, like I've said, those bad moments were usually countered by the sheer bliss of sitting on a beach on St John like Teresa said, or snorkling at Coki, or living in a very romantic setting with the one i love. too bad beach-going isn't a job here, or i'd be a millionaire!

and most most most of all, i will be forever grateful because we got our little baby doggie here from the humane society who is such a joy in our lives! she'll soon be a jaded New Yorker and will trade lizard chasing and sunbathing for squirrel hunts and slush puddles, but hopefully she'll do fine. I think now that there is an "end in sight", we will appreciate and enjoy St Thomas more than ever and take full advantage of the remaining weeks we have here. And yes, I can't wait to drink a Starbucks latte (2 yrs ago i would have never ever believed such a statement could come out of my mouth-- support local coffee shops!), get some new stuff at the Gap, order thai food that will be delivered to my door, visit with friends, and look through the photos of our time on St Thomas.

Steve--
I can't speak for St Croix, but if you are moving to St John or St Thomas, the roads are soooo steep and windy and narrow that our Jeep has to chug to make it to the top. Only an insanely in-shape person, like maybe Lance Armstrong or something, could get around the island via bike. And it is so hot and humid for so much of the year that you'd be winded and dehydrated in no time. I have seen a couple bikers while living here, but it is really dangerous since there are no shoulders on the road. Even pedestrians need to watch out because cars whip around sharp turns and often go our of their lanes just enough that a pedestrian really needs to watch their back. A lot would depend where you work and live (if you lived on the east end and worked in red hook you could do it, but most roads getting to and from main areas are very mountainous and steep). In the rainy hurricane season, biking would be horrible.

Ryan (and others asking about jobs)--
I think you will be able to find work at a restaurant or hotel serving or bar tending. There are usually a lot of jobs in the paper for those types of positions. I think working in that field would help you meet tons of people too.

I also think that you could make a lot of money here as a good, reliable, PUNCTUAL handyman/car repairman/appliance fixer. Also, if you are a techie and could be an office's IT guy, there is a shortage here from what I can tell.

STOP with the Thai food thing or I may be on the plane with you! 🙂
Ugh, it is so hard being pregnant and having craving here...What I wouldn't give for some Chicken Panang!

*Gasp*,
You are probably tired of this thread by now but I must add my "BRAVO - WELL DONE" to the crowds. You accomplished something by your nine months here that many of your friends in the mainland have not. You have come to realizations about yourselves that are hard to come by. A true knowledge of yourself comes with age and experience. You have jump started that by taking a chance of a road less traveled. From now on, you will have a larger appreciation of who you are and what is important to you. You need never defend what is important to you. It just is and there is no right and wrong about. I doubt I would have stayed here at your age and in your situation. At my age and life situation, St. Thomas is a perfect choice and fit. So, again Well Done.

Pamela.

Ummmm.... are there really (*GASP*) NO Thai restaurants on STX??? Horrors!!!

There used to be one on STX called "Thai Garden" and whenever I was there on business (I live on STT), I would order ahead and they would pack it up for me so I could take it on the Seaplane. Alas, they folded.

There is a rumor going around STT that someone has plans to open a Thai/Indian restaurant. My hubby knows the putative chef, I promise I will let everyone know if and when this gets off the ground. YUM!!!!!!!!!!!

Gourmet Gallery does offer a line of Thai food to cook yourself. It is an okay substitute. Onika, I sure hope you are not teasing us! I would love to have some good Thai food! Oh yes, I forgot, a friend told me that Azure or something like that, restaurant at Sapphire, has good Thai food on Thursday nights. I have not tried it, but keep meaning too. (On STT)

Sorry to keep changing the subject - Gasp - I tend to get sidetracked with mention of food. I am on a diet. I have lost about 10 pounds or so. Another fact for new islanders - it is hard to eat healthy here on island. When trying to cook a meal, I usually have to substitute an ingredient or two because of a lack of availability. Fast food on island is usually high calorie. Fresh fruits and vegtables are available, however in this environment I have had a hard time keeping the fruit from going bad. Bananas seem to ripen and turn brown in as little as two days. I don't like having to buy food every other day. Cost-U-less does carry a lot of soy food products, hamburger substitute and such in the frozen section. Lean meat is hard to find. Anyway, I just try to eat less fatty foods and exercise more. It is working...slowly. 🙂

Teresa

Hello Again,

I am really surprised that most of your replies are from people who have already moved/live here encouraging you and not from people who are planning to move picking your brain for insight and opinions. Of course I am not suggesting folks inundate you with questions 🙂 but you are definitely a good source. Your answers are honest, thorough and great. I hope you will entertain another question from me. I appreciate your responses to my previous questions. Thank you.

You mentioned that you wish someone had told you a lot of stuff; you listed car mechanics, cell phone taking a while to get activated, poor treatment of hard working employees and acceptance of slacking off etc. Please, will you reflect and list all that you can think of. It isn't always easy for me to take note of something that I am completely used to and think hey someone not from here might think 'what kind crap is that' or something along those lines 😉 so your feedback is useful and appreciated.

Side note: Its been a while since I got my cell phone so I was curious about it taking 4 hours. I called RS. I was told that activating a cell phone usually takes only a few minutes; the whole process of helping the customer choose a phone, a plan etc. might take 30 minutes. I asked why it might take 4 hours and they said if Sprint was doing a maintaince, which they do about twice a month, or if the system was down which happens from time to time then there isn't anything they can do but wait and keep trying and then it could take a few hours. They didn't mention Cingular. Now... not sure that was the case when you were getting yours. 😛

--Islander

yes, with Sprint and my cell phone getting set up, there were multiple issues that happened-- system went down, employee chatting on phone with her friend for over 20 mins, couldn't find the right charger for it for a while, printed out all the forms and signed them only to realize she'd miscalculated my bill so we had to go through it all over again, (system went down a 2nd time), employee rummaging around in the back for half hour, one walk-in customer came in which meant i wasn't being helped for a while (although i think this was when the system was down). it was excrutiating, but i must say that the employee was nice as could be (even if she didn't move too fast). and it might have been only 3+ hours, not a full 4 hours.

Let me think on all the other frustrating aspects of living here that i wish i'd known before heading down. It's hard to think of specifics now, but there's plenty! I'll post again tomorrow.

I have to add my voice to what is growing into a chorus of "Great Posts". I learned more reading the chain from this post then hours of searching fruitlessly on the web.

Gasp, your thoughts are so insightful and full of articulate logic. My wife, 4 year old son and I are considering a move to St. Thomas for a 6 month to year trial run. We are not ready to commit fully and figure a year will give us time enough to figure out if island living is really for us.

Luckily we don't have to worry about employment because your post sure put into perspective what we have witnessed first hand with respect to the business/customer service attitudes in the islands. We concur absolutely with your point.

Thank you for putting in the time it took to so fully articulate your thoughts. I am going to insure that my wife reads the entire chain and I am positive that many, many other people will benefit from your reasoning and efforts.

Folks,

I have to pop in and say that I have had excellent, friendly service from almost everyone I have done business with on island. In fact, there was only one experience when I felt I was treated rudely: a gentleman who works at the casino repeatedly refused to service the slot machine I was playing after I hit a jackpot, even though he consistently responded to the three other customers sitting near me in a row of only six machines). However, my complaint was taken quite seriously when I reported it to a manager.

I don't know if my experiences have been so different from *Gasp* and others because:

-- I live on St. Croix,

--always use the proactive crip disarming "talk to me instead of about me with my husband" strategy of going out of my way to greet everyone with a big smile along with the polite "Good Morning/Afternoon/Night" (For what it's worth, several people down here have told me that I bring positive responses out of the people I encounter. Please note that this observation is not intended to imply that *Gasp* and the other nice people who have had bad experiences aren't just as friendly and outgoing as I try to be.),

--there is a sense of pity that leads people to be nice to me because I'm sitting in a wheelchair, or

--I just happen to be a lucky exception to just about every rule.

Whatever it is, I felt it necessary to let those considering a move here know that someone has had good and even exceptional service from -- and, more often than not, shared a laugh or two with -- the folks who work at places as diverse as WAPA and the telephone/cable company to KMart/Cost-U-Less to Gallows Bay Hardware to the local Social Security Office (in fact, the federal employee I work with at the SSA is one of the nicest, most caring and supportive people I have ever encountered).

HC

Here are a few concrete examples of things that can be frustrating down here that I thought of (again, just my experiences, not saying this happens for all):

-- Innovative taking weeks to set up phone or cable, not being able to call innovative directly (bad phone system on their part) when something goes wrong. sprint cell phones don't offer 411 info here either, and my cell phone here for some reason would never recognize incoming call #'s even when the person was programmed into my phone contacts. very frustrating for those of us who heavily screen our calls when everyone (even Mom) shows up as "unknown" 🙂 (oh, btw, there is no dsl service on the part of the island where i live and it costs about $90+ a month in the parts of the island where it is offered. not 100% sure, but this is what i hear. so keep this in mind techies!)

-- not knowing about "Under the Lime Tree" car repairmen (locals who might not be trained very well in car repair, but seem to know some stuff and will come to you to help with oil changes and basic repairs for a decent fee) and not knowing just how hard it would be to get a repair done if needed. not one person in either of our offices could recommend a place to take our Jeep Wrangler (despite like 50% of the cars here being Jeep Wranglers!!). most just shook their heads in a "good luck, man. i don't know what to tell you" kind of sympathetic way. this is why i so strongly say that a RELIABLE car, not a beater, is important here. also, i wasn't aware that the auto parts stores regularly just sell out of pieces that you'd need. often they make you order them and ship the parts from the states -- or else you'll be waiting weeks (months?) for the parts to come in, if they ever arrive! about 3 months went by before the lugnuts we needed came into stock at the car places in Tutu mall.

-- knowing about all the DMV fiascos now (check previous posts for more info), i had to laugh out loud when i overheard a west indian employee in my fiance's office say YESTERDAY to a recent island newbie arrival "those problems are exaggerated. if you just go down there early in the morning, there are no problems, it'll be fine". simply not true!! for some reason, the locals here seem to downplay the frustrating aspects of island life or even deny that certain issues exist-- maybe it's a pride thing. like if they admit their gov't is totally corrupt then it reflects on the people who live here. most of us newcomers just want to get a straight answer and not deal with runarounds, but locals seem to think we'll judge st thomas as "backwards" if they admit to those problems. Again, if others disagree or think i'm totally off here, that's fine. by the way, the DMV study guide is written with tons of double and triple negatives so you often have to re-take the test a couple times in order to pass just because of the poor grammar and spelling errors. last person i know who attempted to get thier license was told there are now only 2 booklets for the whole island (maybe even the whole USVI), and they were put on a waiting list. 2 booklets??? again, i feel most locals would deny that the DMV is any worse than on the mainland, and despite the horrors of mainland DMVs, they are very organized compared to here.

--my fiance lost his glasses about 2 months ago. omg, the glasses stores down here have styles from the early 1990s and that's about it. he was horrified and i went with him to make sure he wasn't exaggerating about the selection, and i refused to let him buy any glasses because they were so hideous. ok, perhaps i'm a little vain, but he agreed that he'd rather wear his old pair that are scratched for the next few months until he's back in the states to get a decent pair. the shopping selection is pretty bad here with shoes too 🙂

-- at my job, we have a water cooler. it's hot here, so we drink a lot of water all day.. the staff, the clients, the walk-ins... we all drink water. so, when the water cooler started only dispensing boiling hot water, we called right away for a new cooler or a repairman. well SIX appointments with Crown Mtn Water (all no shows) and 2.5 weeks later, we got a new cooler. begging didn't hurry it up, being mean wouldn't have helped, calling repeatedly every day didn't seem to help. it's not like i could have called another water cooler service and given them our business, because to my knowledge, Crown Mtn Water is the only one. very frustrating and never have i appreciated a working water cooler so much! we were getting very thirsty for a bit... just one example of how these minor inconveniences can become maddening. i know, i need to be more zen.

-- insurance. sorry to beat a dead horse, but professional companies not offering insurance as part of a salary deal was a shocker. my fiance was offered his salary, "full benefits", etc. i guess he should have looked into the insurance package first (his mistake), but when someone tells you full medical coverage, one would assume you could go to the doctor if you needed to. not so! his "full benefits" meant emergency hospitalizalation coverage ONLY. no doctors visits, no annual exams covered, and even if he were in the hospital, they wouldn't cover anesthesia or post-op needs. forget about prescription coverage. he was so upset when they gave him his booklets to look through and went to his HR person who played dumb about how he felt misled about his coverage and said, "well unless you've got some problems or something, you usually only go to the doctor maybe once a year, and you make enough to cover that visit anyway". !!!!! sorry, but wtf is that?? um, maybe he has allergies and needs to go regularly, maybe some unforseen issue will come up that requires multiple doctor visits, ANYTHING could happen, and this is why we ask for insurance as part of the deal before we take a job. and besides, he shouldn't have to explain why he might need to go to the doctor whenever he needs to. most locals in his office were in awe when my fiance explained the standards of co-pays and stateside insurance, which made us realize that it wasn't just this employer who gives crap insurance. his poor coworker was in a car accident and had to spend thousands of dollars at the chiropractor due to her back and neck injuries. her "insurance" offered by her employer of course didn't cover it, which sucks. this is part of a larger nationwide health care problem, i know, but it seems like his employer could have mentioned that medical coverage down here is different than the states rather than saying they offer "full coverage".

wow, long rant. ok i'm tired now, but if i think of more things, i'll post.

Thank you Gasp. I am familiar with all of the points you made. Said yes, yes, yes while reading it all. Sorry to have you dig up all these rants... I know that doing it likely makes you a bit mad all over again. But it truly is useful and again appreciated! 🙂

--Islander